Rock bottom + a vest

Karen Kane Faux Suede Vest

There is only one good thing about waiting to go to therapy until you feel like you’re having a breakdown, and that’s that you feel like there isn’t any further down to go. As you might assume, I have started therapy. And yes, I felt that horrible. I’ve been on Zoloft for mild depression/anxiety since college, so over a 1/3 of my life. But it was proscribed by my neurologist. I mentioned in this post that epilepsy medication has an effect on your mood (as well as just having epilepsy!), so epileptics are frequently on antidepressants. But I had never seen a therapist/counselor/psychiatrist anything until this past Friday.

It was…hard and it was refreshing. I had been feeling like at failure at work for a while, so that was the focus of my first session, as well as the sudden frequency of my panic attacks. (Rather than one every month or so, I have been having several a week.) Thanks to my insurance, my co-pay is small, but I was at the point that it didn’t really matter how much it was. When your mother is suggesting you seriously think about going on short-term disability, you know you need to make some changes. But after my first session, I have to admit that I’m hooked. I came out feeling 300% better.